Wednesday, April 2, 2014

Definitions of Pleasure for Various People

1.    Pressing my bruises. I don’t know why, but I get a weird sense of pleasure from the pain. Maybe I’m a masochist!

2.    After a long hard day at working, crashing into bed with feet elevated.

3.    A single day without me getting into an argument with my parents.

4.    Devouring in one sitting…12 inches…worth of sudoku!

5.    Checking the ATM during payday.

6.    Waking up to see that there’s more time to sleep.

7.    Getting a massage on the sands of a beach on a lazy afternoon, as I fall gently to sleep.

8.    The first sip of ice cold tea after a long hike.

9.    Seeing the look on my cheating ex-boyfriend’s face when I left a message for him on his car…using spray paint.

10.  Pleasure is knowing that my natural smell can give my partner a standing ovation.

11.  The smell of my boyfriend. Even his clothes, towels and underwear.

12.  When my baby cries and turns to me instead of his nanny.

13.  Getting a personal e-mail from Emma Watson.

14.  Secretly taking pics of handsome hunks.

15.  Seeing government officials charged in court for criminal offenses I investigated.

16.  Peeing after holding it for 5 hours in traffic jam.

17.  Pleasure is letting a mosquito feast on your blood, then swatting it to death.

18.  When my baby finally falls asleep after 45 minutes of screaming.

19.  Getting a surprise hug from your mom after being dumped by a girl.

20.  Pleasure is even if you’re not cuddling, but when your toes meet under the sheets, you can’t help but smile knowing she’s just there.

21.  An ice cold bottle of beer to go with leftover dish.

22.  Pleasure is holding a warm bird with its eggs on a bushy nest to warm my hands on a cold winter morning.

23.  Watching that someone you hate with all your might suffer.

24.  Receiving a text from a crush even if it says: “Stop harassing me!”

25.  A well-planned revenge that took years to plan and goes perfectly like clockwork.

26.  Pleasure is having to pull down your wife’s underwear for her in the comfort room because she just had a manicure.

*Credit goes to The Morning Rush entries by Chico and Delamar of RX 93.1

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